Reason being is there are so many birthdays of people I know this month. Also my birthday is in August. But enough about birthdays, its just another day anyway. More importantly, Ramadhan is coming soon and hopefully all of you are ready for another month of fasting and sembahyang terawih. Ive always enjoyed ramadhan, especially the days when I dont have to go to work and I can just chillax at home. Its kinda just like every other day I spend at home when im not working, tapi being ramadhan, its extra special.
Ive been thinking lately about mencari bini2. I think its almost impossible. Not that I have been trying though. Its more like, I dont know how to cari while still trying to strengthen Iman. I know it just takes one act and it can destroy everything you try so hard to improve upon. Making mistakes once and then asking Allah for forgiveness is fine, thats why it is called a mistake. But doing it balik balik and your taubat just seems pointless. A sincere taubat is also a promise that we will not redo the same sin from which we are seeking forgiveness from. This is one reason why I plan on not dating, not main2-ing with girls and going on pointless dates. To find someone to love in the name of Allah is a huge challenge. And being able to put aside all the doubts and fears you have, to be going almost blindly into a relationship and a marriage, this is where faith really comes into play. To believe fully that Allah would not set things up this way without there being a reason. Who are we to say the old ways of cari bini and cari lelaki are inferior to the courting rituals masa ani.
I dont know really. Payah wah banarnya to be able to promise yourself to a person and also fully accepting that person into your life, and vice versa. It seems like an impossible task. I guess thats why we need to keep the faith. That there is a plan for all of us and we just need to chillax a little. Stop rushing life and giving into our urges and temptations. Insyallah we will all find the person we are meant to share our lives with. Amin
Assalamualaikum
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i suppose the first step is to reflect on why you are looking for what you are looking right now. apa yang tani cari atu match kah inda dengan kenapa tani mencari.
ReplyDeletemaybe, just maybe, balum ada rezeki pasal like you said you are 'still trying to strengthen iman' (although come to think of it, ani lifelong pursuit jua ni ah) nah i lost track of my thoughts tia. anyhoots..may Allah guide your search.
z